Saturday, February 7, 2009

"Real Person?"






I love being a mother; wouldn't trade it for a million dollars but some days it would feel nice to be a "real person" for the day... A woman without snot smeared across her shirt or a gummy bear stuck to the bottom of her sock. How would it feel to wake up, get straight to work doing whatever task I set my mind to achieve that day and do it without 20 interruptions per minute? Not to mention trying to have a shower without someone opening the door every 30 seconds to tell me what someone else took from them, spilled on the floor or wrote on the wall. By now everyone reading this is thinking what a horrible mom. That's okay...I'm just saying what we are all thinking sometimes. Parenting is hard! Is this REALLY what we signed up for?

In light of the recent economy slump, I've begun looking for a job. At first the search was exciting. The prospect of someone paying me money for whatever talent I may have sounded very appealing. I could get up in the morning, be that "real person" for a few hours then come home again. Like a split-identity or something, right? So it seemed until the actual applying, interviewing and phone-calls began...

Suddenly I was overwhelmed with what I will have to sacrifice if I go to work. All the walks on sunny afternoons. Staying in bed till 10 am watching cartoons with kids piled all over me. Sticky kisses and scraped knees. This is what I dreamed of doing my entire life and when I think of leaving it behind everyday it absolutely breaks my heart. With every one of these messy little stinkers in my house I have given up another little piece of myself but in doing so have gained so much more. I have learned to love, to feel and to dream what someday might hold for each of them.

So while I may be out in the work force shortly, I've learned an important lesson for now: Cherish it...Every second of it! Cherish untangling Barbie's hair from the Matchbox car wheels. Cherish untying the socks wrapped around the big dinosaurs to hold on the baby dinos. Cherish the laughs and the tears and the fact that I can be here for ALL of it today....because we never know what tomorrow brings.

This IS what I signed up for. The hardest, most exhausting, messiest, most emotionally draining position in the world! And the most priceless...Motherhood.

9 comments:

Lindsey said...

Oh that made me cry! I don't think I really knew how hard it was going to be to be a mother! I never knew what real fear was til I was a mother! Thank you for reminding me to appreciate being with them everyday! I wouldn't change it too!

Unknown said...

You're AMAZING Lora! Thank you for your insight and giving me a big, swift kick in the behind to appreciate where I'm at in life!

brooke and josh said...

I'm just beginning to learn what being a mother is all about, But this just reminded me how you need to appreciate every moment no matter how fast time flies. lets get together soon... Luvs!

Anonymous said...

You are so inspiring to me! Being a mother is so difficult yet so rewarding all at the same time. I just want to go hug my kids and tell them how much I love them. They are growing up so fast and I need to appreciate EVERY moment, the good and the bad. Thank you Lora!

Catherine said...

That was a really sweet entry and all so very true. Being a mom is not easy but it is so rewarding. Your kids are so cute and they are growing so quickly. We are about to add another addition to our family in about 7 weeks. I am so excited to welcome the little guy into our family. I hope all is well with you.

Nicole S. said...

I just love reading your posts, you write so well. They almost always bring a tear to my eye. What you said is so true about being a mother. Thanks it was something I needed to hear today.

Teresa said...

You are really fabulous! Thanks and good luck!

Utah Valley Interfaith said...

Sweet friend, I have that career - get up every morning at 6am to work out, then get ready - clothes ironed, hair fixed, briefcase/bag packed, then off to work by 8am. Work all day, get home by 6pm, make dinner (ha!), retrieve e-mails, phone messages, kiss my husband, give my home a hug, volunteer and church work, then back to bed by 10pm if possible - with the bedroom and bathroom being the most visited rooms in our home. Then I get up and do it all over again! The money isn't even worth it, but there are bills to pay . . . I'd go back to diapers, spit-up, and "what's that" tomorrow - but alas, tomorrow is just another day at the office. Oh - you know I haven't turned on my stove in 2 weeks? Who am I anyway? Happy, tired, and anxiously awaiting the weekend!

Melissa said...

I love reading your blog! You really have a way with words! Thanks so much for the reminder of what an incredible job & priviledge we have as mothers. I need to appreciate it more everyday!